No one is the savior they would like to be

Today was a surprisingly great day. I went to my first class of the summer semester. My advisor is teaching it, so I wasn't sure how I would feel about that. But, so far it seems to interesting and useful. After that I went to go clean my stink bugs' cages and feed them. I know most people wouldn't get satisfaction or joy out of that, frankly I think most people would be grossed out. But, I really love insects. Raising them from eggs and watching them molt through their instars into adults is the closest thing I've ever had to children. It's really an amazing growth process and it fascinates me. Maybe I'm just an oddball.

My trip to North Carolina was a much needed peaceful vacation. It is so absolutely gorgeous there. I really miss it sometimes. The mountains are so amazing, and I went on a tranquil 5 mile hike that I really needed to do. I almost didn't go, because I didn't think I could do all five miles without hurting my knees. But I did it anyway. In TOMS and cut off jean shorts. That was probably a bad idea, but totally worth it.

My longest, best friend asked me to photograph her engagement photos! I am beyond excited and honored. When I think about the women in my life today I can really see how far I've come as a person. Having these amazing, strong girls as friends is something that I really didn't know I was missing for so long. Sara opened the door for that in high school when she basically forced me to be her friend. It has proved to be one of the most important, influential friendships I've ever had. I'm so excited to be part of her wedding and all of the planning and craziness that I'm sure it will entail!

"Friendship is when people know all about you and like you anyway."

Dynamite with a laser beam

I wish I had stayed in North Carolina longer. It is so beautiful there. I felt more peaceful during those 5 days than I have in months, which is saying a lot.

School has already begun stressing me out. I have to finish my research proposal, submit an abstract (that I still have to write) for a huge conference in San Diego in December where I have to speak in front of hundreds of people, and I just started a class that has a lot of writing assignments. I'm mostly concerned about my proposal, which I have to finish, turn into a powerpoint presentation, present in front of faculty, advisors and students, and then defend it and answer questions. We all know how much I love being in front of people.

All I really want to do is clean my apartment and watch Dexter all night.

Little bit, little bit

Things are pretty overwhelming for me right now. I just have so much to do that I never seem to whittle down my to-do list. My field work is coming to a close, but is still taking up a lot of my time. I always have something to finish, and I hate that feeling. My parents are coming up this weekend, which is very exciting for me. I miss them a lot. It will be nice to celebrate father's day and my birthday. I have the best parents.

Diesel is being so needy lately. He sleeps in my blankets, in my bags and follows me around everywhere. But, he's so adorable.

Especially when I give him cardboard boxes. He thinks he can fit into all of them. I don't have the heart to tell him he's too big (big, not fat). Micio just sleeps under the bed or on my clean laundry.

Coffee at Volta. I love this mug. So much that I never use it for fear of breaking it. I do that a lot. Buy something because I love it and then never wear/use it because I don't want to ruin it. It's just stuff. I need to work on that.

A storm on the way back from the field (the one that I got soaked down to my socks and underwear in), and the sunset.

I saw a bald eagle on the way to the field one day. It was huge. I got a lot closer than this picture looks. Beautiful. I think my curiosity is going to get me injured one day...

My honey and his new apartment.

Bah. I feel all over the place today. Can't wait to go to NC for a break!

I just found a flickr account for my friend Kelly, who passed away a few years ago.

I really miss her sometimes.

I turn my camera on

So today I finally respooled some 120 film onto my 620 spools (How-to here). I busted out my Kodak Brownie Hawkeye (circa 1957) and loaded it up. I took two shots, just to test out the flash, etc. The bulbs burn out after one shot, and I only have 5 left, so I'll need to grab some more. Anyhow, this thing is so awesome I don't know what to do with myself:

 

On the left is the old 120 spool, then the camera, flash, roll of 120 film, a bulb and the Hawkeye manual. Drool.

 

The manual - old school.

 

The gray knob is how you advance the film. The gray button on top is the exposure control.

The red circle is how you view what frame you are on. The numbers are printed on the paper that is on the back of the film.

The viewfinder is the square on top of the handle. You look through it from the top, which is pretty neat.

I don't think that I will ever stop shooting film. I love digital and the instant gratification that comes with it. But, something about loading film, feeling it advance and waiting in anticipation to see how it turns out is indescribably soothing to me. I only wish I had the time/money/space for a darkroom.

Come down, come quickly

I keep trying to blog, but I suppose I feel a little weird putting my business onto the net. That and I always seem to get caught up in life.

I feel like the days just rush by, and I feel like I miss out on a lot of opportunities. It isn't a bad feeling, like I'm not living, but I'm just so busy! I sometimes wish I had a pause button on my iPhone so I could just pause life and do some of the things I want to get done.

I miss my friends that don't live here. I am in desperate need of a vacation and a photography outing. But, all in all life is pretty good. I really don't have anything to complain about, and I try to remind myself of that when I get irritated that things aren't going my way.

Tomorrow I'm going to mingle with the hippies and the homeless at the farmer's market. Next week the man and I are heading to NC for a friend's wedding. I can't wait to have a couple of days by myself with nothing but a camera and a credit card. I'm just going to wander around and take pictures until he gets back from camping before the wedding.

On another note, I really need to get my ass back at the gym.